I find I have achieved a new status on the internet. I have been labelled as a stalker by my old friend Azahar.
So interesting to read her post. Of course, it is a story from her point of view. She says: “This is a person who unceremoniously dumped me as a friend by email several months back” The vitriolic emails which she sent to me are conveniently not mentioned. Sorry, I can’t quote them, as I deleted them long ago.
I broke up with her? No, I stopped replying to the emails, and indicated that I thought continuing the exchange was futile. Rather than continue the fruitless email exchange, which was only going worse and worse, I stopped emailing her. Stupidly, I thought to show her that I didn’t hate her by continuing to visit her blog and to make friendly, innocuous and non-judgmental comments.
This earned me spam status. Oh, and another vitriolic email.
My latest crime was to visit her blog, along with just about every other blog that participates in the Saturday Photohunt, and dare to leave a comment about her Mediterranean diet post. The whole comment: “Looks delicious.” Doesn’t that sound like a troll, a flamer, a stalker? I did this despite being aware that I am considered less than dirt, because I try to comment on every Photohunt post I visit. Somehow it didn’t feel right to not try to communicate.
And yes. I fell from grace, tempted by the ThreeWords.me venue. I said “Holds grudges well”. This is patently obvious from her treatment of both me and Daisyfae. I should not have said it, even if it was true, because it doesn’t pass the three rules test: Is it necessary? Is it nice? Is it true? It wasn’t necessary and it wasn’t nice. It was wrong and unkind. Even though it IS true, I’m sorry I said it. It lowered me.
Not only have I been labelled, but I have also been threatened. I’m not sure what I am being threatened with, but apparently Azahar has friends who can cook my goose. Or something.
“Does this person not have a life, do they not know how to move on?” she asks. Oh, I have a life all right. A very good one, which is one of the things I think makes her so angry at me. I continue to visit her blog because despite what she thinks, I do not hate her. I wish her well. And it was completely due to her suggestion and guidance that I ever became a blogger, or even remotely internet literate. So I feel a certain gratitude, which makes it hard to move on. But I can.
And I believe in forgiveness, have forgiven her her vitriol and hatred. Carrying grudges has detrimental effects on your health. So I try not to do this.
But I am a stalker. Anathema. Persona non grata. The world according to Azahar.
To quote Kurt Vonnegut: “Alackaday, and f*ck my luck.”
A stalker??????
I guess so. Maybe. At least some could see it so.
hmm. i’m pretty sure that Jim cooks a better goose than anyone she might even dream to have an acquaintance with.
oh! you didn’t mean that kind of goose.
whatever, her loss.
Yeah, always tough ‘giving up’ on someone. But seriously, some people just aren’t worth the pain. Life is too short to waste on the haters.
Good for you for keeping your equilibrium.
Did I keep my equilibrium? I feel dizzy. . .
accepting that not everyone will like me – and knowing to walk away early and not look back – was a lesson i hold close.
here’s to bygones, and moving forward…
Amen, sister.
Well it just shows you can’t tell – I didn’t realise that you were the “stalker” in question.
Also – as I said on the other blog I don’t know, or need to know what went on, but it does show how two people can have different, and presumably sincerely held, views of the same set of events.
Always seems a shame when friendships break down.
Yes it is a shame. It doesn’t happen that often to me, so it has been very depressing.
Well I just found you from a comment of yours at DaisyFae’s blog. So you can have me as a new blog-mate if you’ll take me….I gotta go catch up on some of your posts.
🙂
Welcome to The Havens, Carla. Hope you enjoy your visits. I must run over to visit you right away.
like. like. like. oh, carla, you’re gonna LOVE the gardens here! and HMH? wait til you see some of the foodie stuff over at carla’s place!